Tikli Bottom

The invitation was confusing to say the least. A bit of bat and leather action at Tikli Bottom, are you in?

How could one refuse? It was only after it was explained to me that Tikli bottom was a place and the bat and leather action was actually cricket, that the penny dropped and I reluctantly agreed.

Another outing for the British School dad's and - owing to the fact that I was playing - no doubt a good hiding! The benefactors of our combined cricketing genius this time was The Baas Educational Trust(BET)school in Garatpur Baas(Haryana). A magnificent charitable organisation that offers an education to the children of three surrounding villages. Baas, Gairatpur Baas and Pandala.

The school is the brain child of our wonderful host's for the day Martin and Annie Howard who have been in India for 25 years looking after tourists at their divine home Tikli Bottom and looking after the village children's futures. Please take the time to look at the website www.tiklibottom.com and if you are feeling flush maybe donate. You will be putting your money to good use.

To the cricket. The format was "simple enough" our erstwhile organiser and team skipper Toby, told us. Two local village teams against us in a "round robin" 10 over-a-side tournament. This was all rounded off with a fairly stern "do you know anyone who has a batting helmet"? Now I love a game of cricket but the version I like involves pies, pints and gentle medium slow bowling. When mention is made of helmets I think more of American football and Ice hockey!

Re-assured by Toby that it would be fine and we are taking along our own mat to avoid the "difficult dust bowl bounce" I arrived on the day full of beans. The village teams we were playing were Baas and Pandala and were there ready for us as we arrived. The first thing I noticed was that they were generally speaking young and particularly athletic, then talk of helmets surfaced again and panic set in.

Having won the toss, we decided to field as we started the first match against Baas. The rules were simple:10 overs-a-side rotating bowlers as much as is sporting; if you hit a 6 into either the village pond or over the wall you had a minute to find it or you are out and you can't be out first ball. All very British one would think.

After the first over, bowled very well by Adam Leetham was spanked for 13 we realised they were taking it quite seriously. It all had a faint whiff of the Aamir Khan film Lagaan were the local villagers in the Victorian British Raj period took on the British gentry over the payment of an unfair tax. If the villagers won the tax would be scrapped for 3 years, I am sure you can guess the rest.

We were not trying to impose a tax, in fact we were not imposing much at all. As over after over of fair to rubbish bowling came down the Baas team found themselves piling on the runs pretty quickly and eventually finished with a fairly impressive 116.

With 12 an over required, we felt reasonably confident,completely Misplaced as it turned out! After a reasonable first wicket partnership of 29 from Adam Leetham (8) and the ever dependable Jamie Heywood (21) the collapse came! Conde and Saif both fell to snorting deliveries which destroyed their stumps and dignity before the rot was slowed a little by Toby and Puneet with 11 and 10 respectively. Tim Bond then quacked his way back to the hutch while Bill - looking distinctly like a proper player - scored 12 aided by a splendid 1 not out from debutant Tony Smith.

After the 10 overs we limped to a poor 65 - 8, the only bright spot being that we were not all out!I still can't help but think that the rapid tumble of wickets may have had something to do with the shared box. The quicker you were out the quicker you got to remove it!

Lunch couldn't come quick enough and we sat and gorged our way through Pimms, Kingfisher and pie while watching how it should be done as Baas played Pandala. With Pandala winning comfortably, we took to the field against them to avenge our earlier defeat. Buoyed by the Kingfisher coursing through our veins we started fairly promisingly, limiting them to about 12 an over!

With Tim Bond taking a breathtaking catch at point and Charlie Benson performing magnificently behind the stumps, we suddenly looked in good nick. Saif and myself popped up with 'once in a lifetime' deliveries that clattered the stumps and we suddenly fancied ourselves. It was to be a false dawn! The runs started to come thick and fast again as the crowd were dispatched time and again into the pond to retrieve huge 6's. Pandala went on to rack up 128 setting us a target of 228 to win the tournament!

We could do it, 23 an over was mathematically possible, we just needed to believe, seize the moment and slog for the boundaries. The score board looked like this:

Tony 5 bowled
Charlie 4 bowled
David 2 bowled
Tim 3 bowled

Can you see a pattern forming here?

Toby 1 bowled
Saib 1 bowled
Bill 5 run out
Pradeep 8 caught
Gareth 1 stumped
Jamie 14 caught
Adam 1 not out

All out for a fairly pathetic 44 and falling about 200 short of the necessary total. There were some bright spots and positives to take forward to the next game however.

Bill looks like a good addition to the squad and there were promising debut's from Tony (Foolishly tried to get his fingers to a massive 6 on the boundary while bouncing off a tree, that's the spirit) and David (Cracking team member, just got to promise not to bowl again).

Pandala were the eventual winners but we had a sense of moral victory as we manged to avoid any serious injury and all live to lose again another day.

Photos from top to bottom:

Martin presenting the Pandala captain with the winers cheque and a magnum of Veuve Cliquot (may have made that last bit up.

Our star player Jamie.

Toby checking the communal box is still in place!

Toby with a rare boundary.

The teams.